May is a month full of observances, and I don’t want to shun anyone by just listing a few. However, I’m most familiar with May as Mental Health Awareness Month, and I want to contribute by sharing some things I experienced and learned on my mental health journey.
Before sharing anything, though, I want to be clear that my post isn’t a source for diagnosis or treatment. Only a professional can do that. But it’s my hope that what I share can help de-stigmatize some ideas surrounding mental health, and I’d like anyone who finds this to feel empowered in their own wellness practices and treatments.
What I Live With
I’ve never been a “happy” person. Even in childhood, my nerves were wrought by a fear du-jour: judgment, nonacceptance, or failure. I had trouble relating to peers and entertained thoughts promoting poor self-image and poor self-concept.
After knowing I wasn’t well for most of my teens and college years, I was diagnosed with dysthymia as a 20-something—a long-term, low-grade depression. The dysthymia subsided, but what “took its place” is a generalized anxiety disorder. I describe myself as “all nerves, all the time,” and I manage symptoms with a combination of treatments.
It took me almost ten years to feel good about my mind and my whole self, so if you’re interested in your mental wellness, here are some things that might resonate with you.
5 Tips to Be Active in Your Mental Health
Hear your thoughts.
Mental health has to do with what’s in our minds, so an important practice for wellness is recognizing the thoughts we have. I’m not encouraging you to dwell on them (which I know is easier said than done), but I am recommending hearing thoughts and questioning them.
Is the thought true? Is there valid evidence supporting that thought?
As a science teacher by training, I got behind the idea of supporting thoughts with evidence to understand myself and find solutions for my feelings. One book that really helped me with this process is Mind Over Mood. Using the principles of cognitive behavioral therapy, Mind Over Mood goes over the patterns of thought and general moods associated with different psychological conditions. Their Thought Record worksheet is an awesome tool for capturing thoughts that trouble you to analyze them and rebuild them into something supported by truth.
Knowing the kinds of thoughts you have and what they’re about will help you in all other areas of your mental health journey.
Find professional advice.
This is a hurdle for many people, and if you’re one of those many, you’re not alone. I’ve known a lot of people who grew up in families that treated mental health as taboo—and therapy as an unspeakable shame.
About 1 in 5 people in the U.S. look for treatment for their mental health, and about half of them see a therapist or counselor. I can only imagine the numbers are actually a little higher because of the pandemic, but regardless, over 20 million people in the U.S. have seen a therapist or counselor. Even if they aren’t people in your immediate circle, they are out there!
Finding a therapist isn’t always a clear process, and when I reached a point where I knew I needed help, I was overwhelmed. My first therapist was my then-sister-in-law’s therapist, which had its pros and cons, but I’ve since found therapy that works for me. (And the practice accepts my health insurance with no copay because of the pandemic!)
Knowing I have guaranteed time—as long as I schedule it—to air out concerns and work on my thoughts is a relief in itself, and it’s comforting to know that when I’m feeling really low, I won’t have to work through it on my own. And when I’m feeling really positive, I’m excited to share my successes with my therapist. Getting reassurance I’m on the right path will keep me going!
Honor your physical body.
Some days, I feel bad. Anxiety can make me feel like I’m not still—even if I’m staying in place. I lose sleep, lose motivation, and become irrationally afraid of doing some of the most basic things. GO TO THE SUPERMARKET?! HOW?!
When I feel this, I honor my body’s cues and give it extra care. I’ll take it easy that day and sit in more restful positions as I work, wear comfortable clothing, and practice mindful breathing. I’ll make a point to get fresh air, even if it’s just from a window. I know movement helps, and I’ll admit I’m terrible at it. This is something I need to work on because I understand the whole-body benefits.
Also related to whole-body, I watch what I put into it. There’s definitely truth to the adage, “You are what you eat.” I don’t eat 100% health 100% of the time, but I know taking in too many simple sugars will make me feel like garbage.
Set boundaries.
This is HUGE. Recognizing the boundaries you need and actually executing them might take some courage—because we live in a society hyper-focused on presentation.
Social media is part of the challenge, at least, for many people I know. The assumptions and etiquette of social media connections can be its own blog post (and maybe should be!), but the real truth is:
Not everyone deserves to know everything about you.
Deserve. People should earn a place in your private world, whether that’s through legitimate friendship or the personal markers you use to measure trust.
When I was planning to divorce, I left personal social media, and it was a healthy move. Once I was comfortable with myself again, I started a new social media account on a platform I’d avoided—Instagram—and found my safe space. My personal Instagram account has very limited followers, and early on, I denied a lot of requests. I worried my “delete” was offensive (and maybe, to some it was), but I asked myself this, What matters more, how I feel about my social media presence or how someone else does?
Boundaries aren’t exclusive to social media. They’re important in real-life relationships and your relationship with work, too. Be aware of where you’re putting your energy, and make sure you make space to give energy to the people and things supporting your wellness.
Find things to do that have immediate results.
Nothing about improving mental health is immediate, so I found having small, noticeable wins helps improve my mood.
Here’s a list of some things that may make you feel successful or accomplished. It’s not complete, but it can get you thinking of something readily available to you.
- using a checklist for the day’s SMALL, BASIC tasks
- writing in a journal (or blog!)
- cleaning or organizing
- home improvement / repair
- home decorating
- art (even if you don’t show it to anyone)
- baking
- making a fresh salad
- working on a puzzle (and celebrating small progress!)
Mental health is HEALTH. Over the past few years, I’ve seen improvements in the way it’s discussed and addressed—in schools, in the workplace, and in the media I consume. To help ourselves and the people we care about, bringing awareness to impact mental wellness has on our overall wellness is key.
Wherever you are on your health journey, I wish you well.
What have you done to improve your mental health? If you’re just beginning to think about improving your mental health, what’s one thing you can do today to support your mental wellness?